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Welcome Betsy St. Amant

FIRST Happy Memorial Day!!  A huge Thank You to those awesome men and women who gave the ultimate sacrifice to ensure our freedom.  Let us not forget to honor them and their families today and every day as well as those currently serving in our military. 

Now, please join me in giving a Big Welcome to our guest today, Betsy St. Amant!  Remember to leave a comment for your chance to win one of her great books!  🙂


As a published author, I have a secret to share with aspiring authors…are you ready? Here it comes.

Rejection burns.
And it never gets easier.
But don’t worry, this fact is meant to encourage, not depress. Think about it – you’re not alone! The fear that grips your heart every time you hit send on that email or drop a SASE in the mail slot or sidle up to your pitch appointment table at a conference…you’re not alone. We’re all scared. We all get rejections, even multi-pubbed authors. I just contracted a new novel with my publisher, Steeple Hill, but that was after my first idea was turned down, and the current idea revised significantly…and this is my fifth book for them!
I also know an author who literally had a novel on the NY Times best seller list, and hasn’t sold a fiction book in a year. The economy is still tough, publishers are tightening their belts, and its affecting everyone at every level of their writing career.
Again, this is discouraging news, but its meant to encourage. Because it all boils down to this – we’re in the same boat, and God has the oars. He’s ultimately in control of our writing careers, and the best news of all is that nothing is impossible with God!
I got a rejection today from a different publisher that stung. I had high hopes for this , and really believed the way it was panning out thus far that it would happen. But God has a different plan, and instead of fighting His plan and timing, I’m deciding to go with His current. Because truly, if I think about it, as a Christian woman, wife, mother and author, I would rather be uncontracted and in God’s will than contracted and outside of it. That’s hard to say, but I mean it.
I’m grateful for the contracts I have and for the progress I’ve made in my career. I want to keep growing and learning and trying and failing. Because in the trying and failing, there will ultimately lie success. If we never try, we’ll fail every time.  
So whatever stage of writing you are in, whether you are newly contracted, uncontracted, or multi-pubbed like myself – hang in there. You’re not alone. We writers need to stick together – to encourage, inspire, commiserate. We need each other because we’re the only ones who truly understand. Sure, the husbands can nod and offer hugs while we sob on their shoulder, but they don’t really get it. Our kids can give us big kisses and share their fruit snack gummies, but they don’t understand. But our critique partners understand. Our book club understands. Our blog readers understand. So make an effort today to be there for your writing buddies. Maybe they need a pat on the shoulder or a “good job”. Maybe they need a “you can do it “pep talk or maybe they just need a listening ear while they vent about their bad review, their rejection, their close call with a contract, or their screwed-up pitch at their first conference. Whatever it might be, just being there makes a difference.
The other secret to rejection?
Chocolate, ice cream, and naps really do help  =)
* * * * *
~ Betsy St. Amant ~
Return To Love – Steeple Hill Love Inspired, July 2009
A Valentine’s Wish- Steeple Hill Love Inspired, February 2010
Rodeo Sweetheart – Steeple Hill Love Inspired, April 2010
Thanks for the awesome encouragment, Betsy!  And I love the second secret to rejection!! 🙂  I’m off to stock up!! 
All of us deal with this even if we aren’t writing.  So how do you deal with rejection?  Any secrets to share that will make the sting a little less painful?

12 Responses

  1. I guess I take the philosophy that rejection of something I wrote isn’t rejection of ME. What one person loves in fiction, another thinks is just awful. Very personal tastes.

  2. So true, Cyndi. It often feels personal but never IS personal. Sort of like what Meg Ryan said to Tom in You’ve Got Mail about him putting her out of business. But its all very subjective! What person loves, another dislikes. Editors are no different!

  3. Hi Betsy!
    Thanks so much for your words of encouragement. Since writing is a solitary endeavor, many times we forget we are not alone. I have a wonderful group of writing pals and we all have each other’s back, in good times and in bad. Some of these buds I have never met in person. They are my online friends. Where ever they are, a good support system is a valuable part of a writer’s arsenal.
    Thanks again, Betsy (and Missy).

  4. Hi Betsy!

    I enjoyed this book very much. Who ever wins it is in for a treat. Warmly, Rhonda

  5. Misery loves company, and you said it in a great way, Betsy. My cure for the “R” blues is a handful of frozen M & Ms.

  6. Popping in to say hello! “It’s not me!” This is a great point. If we could only remember there is so much more behind these rejections, I know for me it would make it alot easier. Having those around us who are dealing with the same thing sure makes it a tad bit more bearable. Add in the little extras and it keeps me moving forward. I’ve tried Robin’s cure too and it works wonders!! 🙂 Little colorful bit sized miracle workers of cool chocolate delight. LOL

  7. I’ll never forget an editor appointment when I was trying to sell my first novel, Ten Thousand Charms. He said, “There’s just so much historical out there…my decision would really be based on your writing.” So, I slid my pages across the table, he read them and said, “Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,no.” I think of that as my “Nine no” rejection. That hurt, but it made me super-conscientious about my writing. Sometimes we need to hear the hard stuff!

  8. Loved the book!

    There is nothing wrong with feeling hurt when rejected. I think it is the hurt, anger, and frustration of rejection that makes us try try again.

  9. You’re absolutely right about saying our companionship and strength is in each other. Our husbands and children (at least mine!) are enthusiastic and supportive, but they don’t have a clue as to what rejection feels like. I’m with Barbara — rejection hurts, even if it shouldn’t. What you put on the page comes out of deep inside you, and once the first sting is over, it’s quite possible to treat the rejection sensibly and learn — but wow! That first sting!

  10. Betsy, I gave up the reins long ago…or the oars as the case may be! Great advise!

  11. Great advice, Betsy. Something we all need to remember no matter what success (or lack thereof) we’ve met on this bumpy road.

    And so true about our path. Many times we think we know the right way. We fight against what is meant for us rather than bend to fate or God’s will. It’s something I do need to remember as I place my fingers on the keyboard each morning.

  12. Great post, Betsy! I have treated my rejections in the past with sweets and being with friends. That’s the best thing for me to do. They encourage me. Then, those rejections also make me more determined and watch out for more mistakes in my writing and try harder next time. Then, I also have to remember that my will has to line up with God’s. It is about the timing. I tried getting published a few years ago, and it just wasn’t my time. But God has some kind of plans for all of us in His time. 😉

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