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Practicing BICHOK

Ah, just a little bit late. Sorry about that. I like my posts to go up by the time the sun comes up. I guess if you’re on the West Coast, I made it.

Whoever said “April is the cruelest month” didn’t have an eleven and eight year old because May has me dragged sideways, spun around, and flat on my butt tired. Might have had something to do with two baseball games last night, a reading project due and end of the year celebration. All that was yesterday…wonder what today will bring. On the day I really need some BICHOK action.

Yeah, butt in chair, hands on keyboard. Seemed like at one time that was much easier for me to accomplish…when my real life didn’t get in the way. But, writing is my real life, so why do I let it get shoved to the back burner by people wanting their uniforms washed, wanting me to pick up the dry cleaning, or go by the accountant’s office. By the looks of my boys’ bathroom, I’m a flippin’ hotel maid. Otherwise, why would they leave their wet towels on the floor every morning. As much as I want other people to see me at Liz Talley, I’m mostly Amy, mom, honey, that crazy lady who writes the trashy romance books in her spare time.

That’s enough to give anyone an identity crisis.

I knew we’ve touched upon this several times – the whole marrying the “real” life with the “writing” life, but it bears repetition every now and then, mostly because no matter where we are in either life, it’s tough. So, I think to myself, “If you want people to treat you as a professional, you have to act like it.” Which means if I want others (and by others I mean mostly my family) to see what writing means to me, I have to make it mean something other than that thing I do when I’m not driving the dogs to the vet or taking one of my kids to the umpteenth birthday party. I have to make my writing a PRIORITY.

Here’ s the deal. I’m under contract. I have VERY tight deadlines, but no one else realizes this. Mostly when I talk about my writing, eyes glaze over. Yeah, seriously.  But the deal is – I HAVE to write or break my contract. I don’t want the latter, so I must do the former. But that is easier said than done.

I have to own up to my fault in not making it important enought.

First, I tend to dabble a lot on the internet. Yes, I go to blogs, I comment, I visit writing loops, oh, and I must drop by facebook. And Goodreads. Then I remember I wanted to check on that hotel for when we go to Florida. Oh, and when in New York, I’ll want to catch a Broadway show. Better do some googling. Okay, you get the picture. I’m so guilty of wasting valuable time.

Second, I volunteer too much. My built-in mother guilt complex seems to want to make up for whatever it was I didn’t do (and I can’t even come up with a way in which I slighted my babies) and I say , “Sure, I can be there for 10:30 to hand out juice packs.” And before I know it, my weekdays of set aside writing time have just slipped right down the drain…along with most of the juice because they don’t even drink those stupid things.

Third, I don’t prepare to work hard. I give myself outs. “Oh, well, if the creativity won’t come, it won’t come. I better go finish that Cold Case episode I started.” I sometimes allow myself to give up too easily. And that friends is called laziness. I can be lazy, plain and simple.

So, as I write this post, I’m using it as a reminder to make writing important. Afterall, it IS my job, no matter what others may think. Books don’t magically appear; they take blood, sweat and lots of coffee to create. If I don’t practice BICHOK then I won’t have to worry about book sales, blogging, or promo. I’ll have nothing to promote or show for the time I wasted.

So what about you? What do you use to avoid the thing that you should be doing? Any tips? Please share your knowledge.

*Note: The pic reminds me about what’s important. My writing and my family. That’s my sweet niece Ava Jaymes “reading.”


6 Responses

  1. You’re singing my song, lady! (see the new background? Yep…that was me procrastinating.)

    Reality check…if you are not a writer, you do not get the whole “I’m writing, don’t talk to me” concept. I love my DH but he doesn’t “get it” He’ll open the door to “ask me a quick question”…ARGH There goes my train of thought. It pulls me right from my story, which might have taken me 15 minutes to get there!

    And my mother…She’ll call to chat. She and her mother spoke at least 3x a day. I’m not a phone chatter (was in my teen years, but now? nope) She’ll have NOTHING to really say. She doesn’t get that I work at home (which is one reason I sometimes write better at Starbucks.)

    Here’s your assignment today, Amy. Go to your bathroom. Look in the mirror. Smile. Now repeat after me, “I’m so sorry. I can’t.” “No.” “I wish I could but I’m working.”

  2. man. DH really wrecks in my writing day. when he drives somewhere….he calls….and wants to just chat. Rarely does he call for something important, but it never fails, he always calls when I’ve got the kid finally settled into playing, color, watching a movie or whatever.

    the phone rings, the kid is up “who’s that mommy? i wanna talk? who is that?” then the dog is up…and I’m just like…stop calling.

    but of course, if you get snappy on the phone then you get all wounded sad sound of “I just wanted to talk to you…sorry.” *click*


  3. Okay, I’m putting that on my list of things to do today, Cyndi. LOL.

    I don’t like to talk on the phone either, and Keri, mine does the same thing. It’s like when he gets in the truck or has a break at work, he thinks “Let me call my wife.” Which is great in one way. Glad he’s thinking about me. But on the other hand, he usually calls to say something like, “If you have time today, why don’t you call _____” To which I say, “Instead of calling me to tell me to do it, why didn’t you use this time to DO IT yourself?”

    Okay, I don’t always say it like a smarta**. But , really? Wouldn’t that make more sense?

  4. Oh, Liz, I could have written this post. Except my kids hang their towels in their rooms. 🙂

    Letting the little things get in the way of the writing time (it’s ALWAYS about “clearing the decks” so I can work without distraction, but it goes on forever) is my biggest problem. What works? Doing the writing FIRST. Without fail. But I only manage that once every few weeks (though deadlines make it a LOT easier!).

    Keri, my husband does the same thing! I hate the phone, and I REALLY hate the speakerphone in his car, and he does it all. the. time.

  5. the weirdest thing about the phone?? we were NEVER phone people while we dated. never! if we wanted to say something…it waited until we saw each other.

    never did we hang out on the phone for longer than to make plans.

  6. My husband is just as bad. He’ll call me to let me know he’s leaving work (when a text would do) and then he wants to talk all the way home from work (about 30 min to 45 min depending on the traffic) and it’s usually about nothing.

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