Biggest Change Ever

My husband and I had a meeting last week with Number One’s independent project advisor, so the college process has been on my mind a lot lately. We are officially two years away from graduation, and that is NOT as long a time as it sounds.

This is the first huge change in her life, but it’s also possibly the biggest change in mine, too, even bigger than the day she was born. When we became parents, we’d only been a married couple for three years. Number One will have been part of our household for seventeen years when she’s suddenly not here anymore.

And this is a change I never witnessed. I knew people who got married, had babies, had more babies, before I experienced any of those. But I’ve never seen inside a household whose oldest child has left.

I forced Number Two to talk to me the other day, and asked her how she felt about her sister leaving soon. “Yay and boo,” she said.

Me: Why yay?

Her: Because then I’ll have your full attention.

Me: Why boo?

Her: Because then I’ll have your full attention.

Number Two has never been an only child, and we’ve never parented her without Number One. We had a taste a few years ago, when Number One was in Holland for a week for the Youth Friendship Games, and it’s weird.

The thing I’m looking forward to least is the shift in chores. We can hardly expect Number Two to bear the brunt of all the chores she now shares with her sister, so I’ll have to go back to scooping litter boxes. I told my husband maybe I’d get pregnant again so I could make him do it.

No, that would be insane.

So are any of you half-empty-nesters? What about it surprised you, when your first kid went off to college or out on their own?

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8 Responses

  1. My daughter moved in with her boyfriend for about 3 months after my granddaughter was born. I will say I about went nuts. I was so used to having her around that I missed her and the baby terribly.

    Now they live with us and every other weekend my granddaughter goes to her daddy’s and my daughter is usually with her friends so hubs and I have the house to ourselves and now it’s kinda nice. I miss the chatter from the 2 yr old but it’s also nice not having to constantly get onto her too.

    I find we make less mess when it’s just hubs and myself too.

  2. Listen…getting preggers just so you don’t have to scoop the litter box is really a bad idea! Hysterical, though!

    I thought about your #2, as I was #2. When my sister left for college, I didn’t notice my parents focusing on me more. If they did, I don’t remember it.

    Even though #1 will be at college, she’ll still take up hours of your attention…what is #1 doing? did #1 make class this morning? Is #1 dating? etc. Away but not out of mind…and maybe more in your mind since you can’t see #1 anytime you ‘d like.

    The next 2 years are going to FLY by. What colleges are under consideration?

    • LOL Yeah, I don’t think I’ll resort to the extreme of pregnancy. I could pretend! But no, that would lead to divorce, probably. LOL

      I’m not actually that kind of mom. Number One is so much more responsible and level-headed than I was, and *I* was a stuffy goody-two-shoes. LOL I’ll probably go days without thinking about her, and then feel really guilty. 🙂

      I can’t even tell you what colleges are under consideration. She couldn’t tell you, either. She’s kind of avoiding all that for now. LOL

  3. I’m so close to being a half-empty nester it makes my toe nails curl just thinking about it! My oldest will be a junior in the Fall. It seems like only yesterday she was going into the 6th grade. I’m holding on to every precious moment I can. All I can do is send hugs your way…I’m really going to miss my kids when they are out of the house! It will be way too weird, as you put it!

  4. I’m a #2 (giggles, sorry, I giggled through your whole post using #1 and #2). My sister left and yeah…she went to college. *shrug* Wasn’t that big of a deal on me. I stil had school and school actitives keeping me busy. I saw my parents pretty much the same amount.

    Oh wait! I did notice one difference—the clothes in my closet quit disappearing…unless sister came home from college, then the magic act started up again.

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